My story captures the pain of growing up without affirmation and self-love. I felt alienated by the world for not fitting in the boxes of beauty and intelligence that society creates until the day I accepted that it is ok to stand out, I do not have to fit in. I began to embrace my dark completion and started living instead of existing.
What skills and resources were you able to draw from the community for this project?
I know I stand on shoulders of giants: Every girl needs a Brother like Mjusto that can carry her when she can not even take one step, a Skoni that believes in her even when she ceases to believe in her self, a tribe of friends that consistently have her back, a Prof like Vincent who taught me to fight for what I believe in and acts of kindness from Marcel de Villiers as a testimony that nothing is impossible with God. I learned to be an eloquent speaker, I embraced kindness, and I came out to be a confident person ready to see the world and be the leader I needed when I was younger. I also learned that dedicating my time to my passion fulfilled me and that I valued collaborations because they improve my people's skills, patience, and sense of humour. .
The challenges
It’s a story of resilience and grace which I would love to share with every black girl that doesn’t think she’s smart enough, beautiful enough, light enough, baby girl you are enough, and you are the light at the end of the tunnel stop looking for the light elsewhere!!! You are the light you have been waiting for, so shine on. Never deem your light for anyone instead get them sun shades, but most importantly, never stop sharing that light. A candle never ceases to be a candle from lighting other candles.
Addressing the challenges
It’s ok to embrace difference, and human beings were meant to evolve anyways!!! I hope sharing my story will inspire one girl to see beyond all the negative labels, bullying, and self-doubt. I also pray that parents, friends, and family will learn to affirm their girl children from a very young age. So they never have to ever feel lonely in the world because they are trying to squeeze into boxes that were never created for them. I do not know if this story will make a difference in any one's life, but by just telling it, I feel the difference in my spirit.
The achievements
This is an ongoing project of self-discovery; my journey is in progress. For the first time, I am publicly sharing my story with millions of women who are or may be doubting themselves hence stunting their true potential. I was able to use my setbacks as a comeback. I am using my Ph.D. journey as a testimony that anything is possible when you believe!!!! I hope to change the mindset that a Ph.D. is about being smart. It’s actually about perseverance, grit, resilience, patience, and more than anything trusting the process. If a black girl from Ticwantfwini can break stereotypes, you can too.
Johannesburg, South Africa